


Inhale Exhale

by BrieflyMaximumPrincess



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, M/M, Yoga, crackfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-26
Updated: 2016-11-26
Packaged: 2018-09-02 09:32:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8662357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrieflyMaximumPrincess/pseuds/BrieflyMaximumPrincess
Summary: Lucifer is stressed and go to the gym at night. The only other person here at this late hour is Sam, who proposes to him some yoga training.





	

**Author's Note:**

> English is not my main language, I apologize for the numerous typos and errors you will find.

It was eleven thirty in the evening and Lucifer wanted to murder someone. Preferably his employee. Yes, it would delight him and would work wonder on his nerves, for sure. But no law ever said he had the right to do it. Not even if it would have been for the greater good of the whole Humanity. So instead, he sent him back home with the usual screaming on his bloody incapacity and hoped, one day, he won’t come back. But let’s be honest, it would be horrible too, because he needed someone to help him in kitchen to feed his patrons. Maybe a rat would be enough to replace him. That worked well in the movie for kids.

  
Oh and after he murdered his employee, Lucifer needed to fucking sleep obviously.

  
But first, he had to get things out of his system. Nights like that called for boxing. Yes some punches in a bag, picturing his employee’s face, would help a lot before crawling in bed. Just an hour to let the frustration go.

  
The sport hall was empty. Bless this 24 hours opened clubs. Their was just the night instructor. A guy Lucifer had saw once or twice. Not really paid attention to, because they were changing all the time. The man greeted him. Taller than him, long dark hair knotted in a bun, charming smile, cute. But too talkative for Lucifer’s mood. Lucifer put his earplugs on, put on his boxing gloves and hit the bag. Man, that was good. In no time his body was warm and his frustration out. The instructor came to help keeping the boxing bag still. After a quarter again, Lucifer had enough. He stopped and took off his gloves and music, sweaty.

  
“Good guard.” The instructor complimented him.  
“Thanks.”  
“Needed to let off some steam?”  
“You could say that.”  
“Now, you are waited at home, I suppose.”  
“Not really.” Lucifer admitted. “I live alone.”  
“Oh. In that case, may I suggest an activity before you go?”

  
Lucifer waited, suspicious.

  
“See there is no other people around here and I’m bored to death. I hate night shifts. There are nearly no one to come around here at night.”  
“Except me, I guess.” Lucifer remarked.  
“Pretty much, yes.”  
“And, in what can I help you?” Lucifer asked knowing where this was going.  
“Yoga.” The instructor announced.

  
Ah no. Lucifer didn’t expect it to take that path. He laughed to himself.

  
“Do I look like someone who does yoga to you?”  
“You should, it’s pretty good for the body. Make deep muscles work, and do wonder on the balance and the coordination, even for the flexibility. Those are important points for a boxer, aren’t they? Also, it’s pretty good for the mind. And don’t tell me, you don’t need it after coming here in the deep of the night to beat something with a death glare on your face like you could murder someone.”  
“You did train your speech, didn’t you?” Lucifer asked.  
“Maybe” Sam admitted. “Please, I have nothing to do all night and I want to present to a serious exam so I will be able to teach somewhere else better than here. I need training.”  
“Ok.” Lucifer agreed. “Why not? But swear there will be no bullshit of weird ass positions and no evidence.” Lucifer threatened.  
“Of course.” Sam tried to hide his amusement. “So, follow me in the main room. I will soften the lights and put on some relaxation music.”  
“Dear God, what did I sign up for?”  
“Ambience is important.”  
“Whatever.” Lucifer said waving his hand and following Sam in the exercise room.  
“By the way, my name is Sam.”  
“Lucifer.”  
“You’re kidding me, right?” Sam asked amused.  
“I’m leaving.” Lucifer answered.  
“No please, no. Sorry. It’s just very unusual.”  
“It’s not because your parents didn’t have any imagination when they named you that everyone is the same.”  
“Sorry.”  
“Plus, they were stoned.” Lucifer added.

  
Sam laughed and installed two mattresses on the floor.

  
“We are going to start with easy exercises, breathing, then some stretches, ok?”  
“Yes, go on master Yoda.”

  
Sam smiled but didn’t let his concentration skip. They linked up moves and poses for half an hour, sometimes cut by a shivering leg.

  
“You push too hard. It’s normal to not have the two sides equal in strength.” Sam explained.  
“I don’t like you.” Lucifer joked.  
“Don’t forget to breath. You can put your hands on the ground if it helps you.”  
“No! I can do it as well as you.”  
“I’m trained.” Sam laughed.  
“You’re a show off.” Lucifer decided.  
“And, we are going back in the dog pose.”  
“Thanks God.”  
“And now, we are gonna laid on the floor, back on the ground. Yes, like that. Open your hands to the ceiling and close your eyes.”  
“What are you gonna do, execute me, now?” Lucifer asked.  
“Just a little bit of relaxation before we end. Can you focus on a sound?” Sam asked.  
“Other than the hippy music?”  
“If it suits you.”  
“The ventilation?”  
“As you want.” Sam assured him. “Can you focus on it? Pay attention just to that and my voice. Nothing else.”

  
When Lucifer opened his eyes, Sam had stopped the music and already put away his mattress. Lucifer yawned.

  
“You can get up when you are ready. No need to rush.” Sam told him in a low voice.  
“Was I asleep?”  
“Just a couple of minutes.”  
“Sorry.” Lucifer apologized.  
“It’s a good thing. It means you benefit of our seance and I wasn’t a so bad teacher.”  
“I have to admit, I’m feeling much calmer now than after my boxing session.”  
“Time to go to sleep now.” Sam advised.

  
That night Lucifer slept like a baby. He even managed to stay calm half of the evening service with his employee listening to an imaginary Sam telling him to breath. Inhale and exhale. Just inhale and exhale. Simple. Just breathing, no murder. Breathing is good, murder is bad.

  
For good measure, Lucifer went back to gym three days after. Just to avoid federal pursuits. And to make sure boxing was easier than hiding a body. Sam had the night shift again. They were alone in the sport club. Why keeping up appearances?

  
“Hey Sam, can you yoda me to sleep like last time?” Lucifer asked.  
"I would appreciate that a lot.” Sam agreed.

  
It became a regular basis meeting. Sam taking the night shift voluntary and Lucifer showing every Saturdays and Wednesdays nights like a clockwork. Having his personal yoga trainer was a big bonus to Lucifer and his licence to the club. That privilege was proposed nowhere else. And Lucifer started to became quite a good apprentice without wanting to admit that it made wonders to his temper too. People actually started to remark a change in his entourage.

  
“Is it sure that is it no trouble to have my personal training session? I mean, won’t other people ask for the same if it’s known?” Lucifer worried.  
“That’s not a personal session. You are just the only one showing at this time of the night where I decide to practise yoga.” Sam assured him. “And it’s is not a personal trainning for me either, if you are asked by my superiors.”  
“Understood.” Lucifer emphasized with a wink. “When is your exam?”  
“In three months.”  
“And after, you are going to work elsewhere?”  
“That’s the goal.” Sam affirmed.  
“So, I hope you will fail.”  
“And we are gonna stay in the the extended side angle pose you like so much now.”  
“You bastard.” Lucifer whined.  
“I didn’t hear.”  
“I said, you are killing me.”  
“Still not hearing.” Sam sing-songed.  
“I’m sorry, that was mean. Please accept my apologies. I want to be able to walk tomorrow.”  
“That’s better.” Sam said. “But you know you can stop a pose anytime you want.” Sam reminded him.  
“And loose the face in front of you?” Lucifer said laying flat on the ground. “Never!”  
“You want relaxation now?”  
“Yay!” Lucifer cheered.  
“You know, next time we can skip the first part to just do this, if you want?” Sam proposed.  
“But It won’t be as satisfying as it is now.” Lucifer argued.  
“Fine, as you want.”  
“This time I won’t fall asleep, you will see.” Lucifer taunted.  
“It’s actually a good thing you know?”  
“I don’t care I can be stonger.”

  
Lucifer failed monumentally this time again.

  
“Crap. One day I will be able to resist your hypnotic powers.”

  
Sam smiled to him.

  
“You wish.”  
“Free meal for you at my restaurant, if you tell no one I keep falling asleep each time you channel your Yoda voice.”  
“As nobody knows we are doing this, is it a way to ask me out for a lunch?”  
“Maybe.” Lucifer admitted.  
“Where is your restaurant?”  
“At the angle of the third avenue.”  
“That’s in the good part of the city.” Sam declared.  
“And that’s a good restaurant too.”  
“Why not?” Sam was tempted.  
“Tomorrow, if it suits you. I will allow you to visit the kitchen, if you can stand on your hands like a monkey in a kickass pose.” Lucifer promised.  
“Like that?” Sam easily stood on his hands, feet pointed to the ceiling.  
“Show off.” Lucifer said impressed.  
“Yeah I’m bendy.”  
“Yes? I wonder how far exactly.” Lucifer taunted.  
“Follow me in the shower, I will show you.” Sam proposed.  
“I thought you would never ask.” Lucifer admitted. “I’m waiting for this since the first time you spoke to me.”


End file.
